FukDatShhh.CoM

NEW YORK (UPI) – The health of employed U.S. workers is trending downward and one in three experiences one or more symptoms of clinical depression, researchers say.

A report by the Families and Work Institute also says 28 percent of employees report that their overall health is “excellent,” down from 34 percent six years ago.

The report also reveals:

• 41 percent of employees report experiencing three or more indicators of stress sometimes, often or very often.
• One in five employees has trouble falling asleep very often or fairly often, and 31 percent awaken too early and have trouble falling back to sleep.
• 21 percent are treated for high blood pressure and 14 percent are treated for high cholesterol.

The report says 49 percent of U.S. employees have not engaged in regular physical exercise in the last 30 days, including 22 percent not engaging in any rigorous physical exercise. One in four U.S. workers smokes.

Having paid vacations bode well for personal health and well-being, as well as intent to stay in one’s job, the study says.

The study used data from the National Study of the Changing Workforce, which surveys the U.S. workforce every five years. Sample sizes average about 3,500, including wage and salaried employees, as well as self-employed workers.

Copyright 2009 by United Press International

Those shoes are not blue nor are they suede.

How am I supposed to slap a ho without an essential part of my balanced breakfast?

Nothing says sanitary like a parrot in the produce section…

“What are you wearing sexy?” -Cowboy boots. “Ya, that’s hot.” – Pink velour pants.

“Ya I like that.” – a little green baby girl hoodie. “Oh damn, that sounds sexy.”

– and I kinda look like Gallagher. “Oh ya…wait…what?”

Let’s run through my rock star list…. Mullet? – check; big sunglasses? – check; heart shaped tattoo?

 – u know I love my mom; Cut jean shorts? – are there any other type of shorts?; wife beater tied at

the midriff – check;….. He is an official ROCK STAR!

I think I just sharted…

WTF???

Is that Rainbow Brite all grown up??

Is that a soccer ball?  A map of the solar system?  The structure of a sub-atomic particle?

I have absolutely no idea what to say…

Is that a gangster leotard?

 

Everyone loves the man in the yellow go-go boots!

Nice purse!

Do you see the flame shoes buddy? That means I will not think twice about karate chopping you

Into the middle of next week!

AHH! I love the frozen food section… it tingles!

Umm… excuse me, sir…

At least the purse matches, right?

Rawr…

No, honey, it’s an ancient Egyptian symbol of prosperity, I swear!

I was wondering why you suddenly smelled better.

Every man has an NFL jersey AND pink short-shorts in their wardrobe, right?

I have the same outfit, only in red.

Just in case you had the urge…

Now all we need is Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem for a reunion tour.

Yes, you are seeing that correctly.  Old man + large, supple breast implants.

1. Pick up after yourselves. Don’t leave your belongings all over the place.
2. Make sure your hosts have time to themselves. It’s exhausting to have people around all the time, and we need to take care of day-to-day business.
3. Don’t assume your hosts can abandon their daily schedule to accommodate you. Plan your arrival and departure with them ahead of time.
4. Contribute to the cost of groceries. Don’t complain if your hosts use products you wouldn’t. If you want something special, buy it yourself.
5. Take your hosts out to dinner at least once — and pay.
6. If you expect your hosts to accompany you to tourist sites, offer to pay at least part of their admission. Remember, they have probably been to these sites dozens of times.
7. Consider purchasing a small gift like a bottle of wine to say “thank you.”
8. If you don’t like these “extras,” stay at a hotel.

I work in the emergency department of a hospital. Based on our daily observations, my co-workers and I compiled a short list of commonsense guidelines to help the public understand how an emergency department really works.

1. An “emergency” is defined as a life-threatening injury or illness. The average wait in an ER waiting room is 4 1/2 hours. After checking in, you will be seen by a triage nurse to determine the seriousness of your illness or injury. Patients who are considered “critical” will be treated first.
2. Please do not come to the ER with your entire family unless they, too, are sick or injured. People with communicable diseases may be sitting in the lobby, so you could be putting your loved ones at risk.
3. Once inside the examination room, the patient’s blood will be taken and tests may be done. Getting test results can take time, especially if the ER is busy — and no, you cannot eat or drink until those test results are back.
4. The ER discharges patients 24 hours a day, so plan accordingly. The hospital is not responsible for paying for your ride home, and you cannot stay in the exam room waiting for a ride to come for you. We must use the room for the next patient.
5. Above all, remember that our staff is here to help you feel better, not to inconvenience you. You are the patient — so please be patient.

– ER NURSE IN FLORIDA

PASADENA, Calif. (UPI) – The planet Jupiter has been slammed by a mysterious object so large it left an indentation the size of Earth, NASA scientists said.

An amateur astronomer in Australia noticed the mark Sunday and contacted scientists at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory, JPL, in Pasadena, California, CNN reported Tuesday.

The object could have been a block of ice or a comet too faint for astronomers to have detected before impact, JPL scientist Glenn Orton told CNN.

This marked the second time scientists were able to observe an impact on Jupiter, the fifth planet from the sun and the largest planet in the solar system, JPL astronomer Leigh Fletcher said in an interview with New Scientist. Fifteen years ago, comet Shoemaker-Levy 9 broke into 21 pieces and hit the planet’s atmosphere.

“Given the rarity of these events, it’s extremely exciting to be involved in these observations,” Fletcher said.

Copyright 2009 by United Press International

Rachel Veitch, who’s 90 years old, bought her last car in 1964. Forty-five years and 558,000 miles later, the Mercury Comet Caliente she calls “Chariot” is still on the road. So what’s the secret for keeping a car running for more than a half-million miles? Just taking care of it.

“I was never a destructive child,” said Veitch, a retired nurse from east Orlando who works as an office volunteer for the Orlando Police Department several days a week. “I still have the first doll I was ever given. I’ve taken care of most everything I’ve ever had, except for husbands.”

How many husbands? She holds up three fingers. “I’ll tell you something: This little Chariot has never lied to me, never cheated on me, and I can always depend on it.”

These days, she and Chariot are working toward 600,000 miles, “and I’ll make that,” she says, “if I live long enough. I tell people, ‘Except for the congestive heart failure, a stroke and a double mastectomy, I’m in great shape!’”

Veitch, who has a complete set of the car’s maintenance records, has the oil changed every 3,000 miles. She buys her own oil and filters because she doesn’t trust the products sold by the oil-change places.

Her longtime mechanic retired, and now her son takes care of Chariot. And when something comes up he can’t handle, they find a professional.

Lifetime warranties

Veitch is big on buying replacement parts that have lifetime guarantees.

“It’s had seven mufflers, and it’s about time for a new one,” she says. “I’ve had 17 lifetime J.C. Penney batteries [and] three lifetime sets of shock absorbers from Sears.”

She and Chariot have become an Internet sensation, thanks to several videos of her and her car posted on GrowingBolder.com, an Orlando-based site targeted at people older than 50. The original video of Veitch and Chariot on GrowingBolder.com has been viewed more than 1.7million times.

Veitch bought Chariot new from a dealer in Sanford for $3,289, which wasn’t cheap in 1964.

“It’s a deluxe model,” she says, “with an automatic transmission, power steering, the premium interior, wheel covers,” and air conditioning that still blows cold air.

Well, cool air.

Veitch drives carefully, confidently.

“It still drives the way it did when it was new,” she says. One feature she added to Chariot was cruise control — after the police caught her going 92 mph.

“The speed just creeps up,” she says, “and you don’t even notice it.”

Chariot has been through a lot, including a collision on a highway where it was rear-ended by another car. Her insurance company told her it was totaled.

“No, it isn’t,” she told them, and proceeded to find parts to fix it.

Chariot’s latest woes

More recently, Chariot’s engine began sputtering and backfiring, and no one could find the problem. Veitch was a wreck: It was possible, she thought, that Chariot’s days were over.

Enter a repair facility in DeLand called Dyno-Tune, and George Lyons, one of the owners. It has an in-house dynamometer — a device that let Lyons strap down the car, put the rear wheels on huge rollers and “drive” it in the shop.

“I was able to get the car up to 60 mph,” Lyons said, and he diagnosed an unusual ignition problem. He fixed it, and Chariot again purrs.

Lyons said a car with mileage as high as Chariot is rare, but “if you take care of your vehicle, get it serviced, don’t abuse it, it can last a very long time.”

Veitch, who has taken Chariot to car shows for decades, has a dozen trophies and plaques from car clubs.

She has had multiple offers for her car but has no interest in selling it.

“One man got quite ugly about it — he said, ‘Everything has a price!’ So I told him, ‘$43,000! That’s my price!’ He went away.

“My little car is so faithful,” she adds. “And I enjoy it so much. And, my gosh, look at the cars on the road now — I don’t think any of them are as pretty as my little Chariot.”

INDIANAPOLIS (UPI) – A teenage girl unable to attend her school’s prom due to illness enjoyed a makeshift prom thanks to the staff of an Indianapolis hospital, an official said.

Community Health Network Foundation spokesman Ryan Chelli said his group and Community Hospital North staff members worked together to offer ailing prom queen Leah Westrick a taste of the Fishers High School prom, The Indianapolis Star reported.

Chelli said the Fishers senior, along with her boyfriend and several other friends, enjoyed a pre-prom dinner Saturday night at a hospital atrium transformed into a temporary restaurant.

Fishers Principal Jason Urban also attended the makeshift prom event to present Westrick and her boyfriend, senior Gabe Hulecki, with their honorary crowns as prom queen and king.

Chelli told the Star Westrick has been at the hospital since April 18 after contracting an E. coli infection during spring break a visit to Mexico. Her condition was not considered life-threatening and she should be discharged within two weeks, Chelli said.

Copyright 2009 by United Press International

If you are interested in how long it takes the items we toss into our landfills to decompose, I found the following illuminating.

• Paper ………………. 2 to 5 months
• Orange peels ………… 6 months
• Milk cartons ………… 5 years
• Filter-tip cigarettes … 10 to 12 years
• Plastic bags ………… 10 to 20 years
• Leather shoes ……….. 24 to 40 years
• Plastic containers …… 50 to 80 years
• Disposable diapers …… 75 years
• Tin cans ……………. 100 years
• Aluminum cans ……….. 200 to 500 years
• Styrofoam …………… Never