FukDatShhh.CoM

• French Lick Springs, Indiana, once passed a law requiring all black cats to wear bells on Friday the 13th.
• Madison, Wisconsin, will not allow joint custody of a family pet when a couple divorces - the animal is legally awarded to whoever happens to have possession of it at the time of the initial separation.
• Dogs in Foxpoint, Wisconsin, may not bark profusely, snarl, or make any menacing gestures.
• In Texas, it’s illegal to put graffiti on someone else’s cow.
• It is illegal to ride a mule down Lang, Kansas’ Main Street in August, unless the animal is wearing a straw hat.
• Over in Berea, Kentucky and also in Willamantic, Connecticut, horses are not allowed out on the streets and highways at night unless the animal has a “bright” red taillight securely attached to its rump.
• Horses may not wear cowbells inside the city limits of Tahoe City, California.
• In Washington, though, every cow wandering the streets of Seattle must be wearing a cowbell.
• In Burns, Oregon, horses are allowed in the town’s taverns, if an admission fee is paid before they enter.
• You can’t blow your nose in public places in Leahy, Washington, because it might scare a horse and cause it to panic.
• In Wanassa, New Jersey, a dog is breaking the law if it is heard to be “crying.”

WASHINGTON (UPI) — U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney joked about inbreeding in his family Monday and wound up having to apologize to the people of West Virginia.

Cheney, speaking at the National Press Club in Washington, noted his distant relationship with Sen. Barack Obama, the Democratic presidential contender from Illinois. He then said he had a grandmother whose last name was Tyler but was descended from a Cheney.

“So I had Cheneys on both sides of the family, and we don’t even live in West Virginia,” the vice president quipped.

While that drew laughs from the crowd, it didn’t sit well with West Virginia leaders, who demanded, and got, an apology, The Charleston Gazette reported.

“I truly cannot believe that any vice president of the United States, regardless of their political affiliation, would make such a derogatory statement about my state or any state, for that matter,” Gov. Joe Manchin said.

Sen. Robert C. Byrd, D-W.Va., said Cheney showed “contempt and astounding ignorance toward his own countrymen.”

Rep. Shelley Moore Capito, R-W.Va., called it “exactly the type of stereotyping that we don’t need from our elected officials.”

Cheney’s office extended an apology.

“The vice president’s offhand comment was not meant to hurt anyone,” Cheney spokeswoman Lea Anne McBride said. “On reflection, he concluded that it was an inappropriate attempt at humor that he should not have made. The vice president apologizes to the people of West Virginia for the inappropriate remark.”

Copyright 2008 by United Press International