FukDatShhh.CoM

Mitch Walter, a water plant worker in Cape Girardeau, Missouri, was making his rounds at the treatment plant. While in his golf cart, a cute, fuzzy bunny jumped in. Awwwwwww. Then the 25 pound bobcat that was chasing the cute, fuzzy bunny jumped in, and the bunny jumped out. Walter shoved the bobcat out of the cart, but that ended with him getting scratched a lot, and a round of rabies shots.

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Silent Library 2 (1of2) - gaki no tsukai

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Worm Overload Recreational Killer

There is a dangerous virus being passed around electronically, orally, and by hand.

This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life completely.

If you should come into contact with WORK, put your jacket on and take two good friends to the nearest grocery store. Purchase the antidote known as Work-Isolating-Neutralizer-Extract (WINE) or Bothersome-Employer-Elimination-Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

You should forward this warning to five friends. If you do not have five friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye…. It reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
10 MILES

He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without a second thought…. Soon he sees another sign which reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
5 MILES

Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS
HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION
NEXT RIGHT

His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS

He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks, “What may we do for you my son?”

He answers, “I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business….”

“Very well my son. Please follow me.” He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door and tells the man, “Please knock on this door.”

He does so and another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup answers the door… This nun instructs, “Please place $100 in the cup then go through the large wooden door at the end of the hallway.”

He puts $100 in the cup, eagerly trots down the hall and slips through the door pulling it shut behind him. The door locks, and he finds himself back in the parking lot facing another sign:

GO IN PEACE.
YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS. SERVES YOU RIGHT, YOU SINNER..